Here Thar Be Monsters!

From the other side of the argument to the other side of the planet, read in over 149 countries and 17 languages. We bring you news and opinion with an IndoTex® flavor. Be sure to check out Radio Far Side. Send thoughts and comments to luap.jkt at gmail, and tell all your friends. Sampai jumpa, y'all.


The Texian Supremacy

Today is a very important day.  More important than March 2nd, though not by much.  Today is San Jacinto Day.

Now for those of you who are not fortunate enough to be Texians, let me explain.

Once upon a time, there was a Mexican state called Coahuila y Tejas, in the northern reaches.  Mexico had won a hard-fought battle against Spain and gained its independence.  The country was fresh with energy and encouraged settlers from North America to come take land grants in the region.  Things were happy and exciting.

Along comes President Antonio Lopez de Santa Anna.  This little gem, who shares many things in common with Barry Soetoro (a.k.a. - Barak H. Obama), decided he needed to be king, so he cancelled the Mexican Constitution, disbanded the Congress and took on dictatorial powers.

That didn't cotton too well with the good Texian people.  They just wanted to live in peace, away from the US, where they could pursue their right to happiness without the oppression of their militant neighbor to the east.  So a bunch of farmers got together and kicked a little butt on the local Mexican army/police.  Then they sat down at Washington-on-Brazos, in East Texas, and wrote up the Declaration of Independence on March 2, 1836.

Well, old Santa Anna didn't like them uppity little farmers getting so full of themselves, so he dispatched the Mexican Army to go up there and kick a little Texian tail.  He even came to join in the fun, and personally led the horrific slaughter of 250 men, women and children at the Alamo, who bravely fought off the thousands of Mexican regulars and bought time for Sam Houston and the Texas Army to gather strength and tactical position.

The blood still dripping from their swords and death in their eyes, the Mexicans marched on Goliad and a few other towns, and laid waste to them, as well.  They ruthlessly slaughtered every human in sight and hung corpses on trees as warnings to anyone who dared stand up to Santa Anna's megalomaniacal ambitions.

By the time the Mexican Army reached San Jacinto, just outside of present day Houston, they were feeling pretty full of themselves.  After all, they had soundly defeated so many poor farmers and their wives and children.  They were unstoppable now!  They camped out on a little tongue of land, under a grove of cottonwood trees, and relaxed a bit on the banks of the San Jacinto river.  Santa Anna availed himself of a young half-breed woman, known as the Yellow Rose of Texas, who had volunteered to help take down the Mexican forces.

Thus distracted, Santa Anna let his guard down and felt at the top of his game.  The rest of the army got a bath to wash off the blood of their evil, not unlike their federal counterparts to the east, when dispatching natives to the Great Beyond.

At dawn the next morning, the Texians attaacked.  A couple of thousand men under Sam Houston (my kin William Davis Durham among them) charged full on into the Mexican camps.  The Mexicans were caught completely unaware and with their pants down, literally.  They had made the fatal mistake of camping on a peninsula, so they had no where to run but to jump in the river, which Santa Anna did.

The small Texian army swept through and in 19 minutes, they had killed over 600 soldiers and captured more than 700.  In the process, the Texians lost nine good men.  This brief moment has become known as the most decisive and swiftest battle in Western history.  Shows you what happens when you Mess With Texas.

Santa Anna, who ran like a bony dog, was caught the next day, dressed in rags and making his way down was is now becoming the insulting and treasonous NAFTA highway.  He was taken to Texian headquarters near present-day Austin, where a few weeks later he signed the surrender under what is now called Treaty Oak.  The famous painting in the Texas national capitol depicts the scene, with Deaf Smith cupping his ear to the left of Sam Houston.

Santa Anna was sent home in disgrace, and thought the treaty did not stipulate Texas' nationhood, it made many key concessions to local leadership.  Later, the US, UK, Netherlands, and France would recognize Texas' nationhood by treaty.  Of course, the US only did it because they had designs on the Colorado and California gold mines.  And they could use a bunch of tough Texians to run interference for them on the southern flank while they stole the western territories.  The Bastards.

I made several attempts, as Secretary of State, to repatriate the Alamo flag, which is sitting in a drawer in the Mexican National Museum.  They won't turn loose of it.  I guess they want to gloat on the lopsided slaughter of great Texians like Bill Travis, Jim Bowie, Davy Crockett and John Wayne (grin).

It just goes to show what a small number of people, with righteousness on their side, who are defending their lives and their freedom, can do.  The Texians show be an example to us all that, even when the odds appear overwhelming, events conspire to uphold those who are true and honest to their cause.

On April 21, 1836, a miracle happened.  It happened because those men believed in what they were doing, and they were defending their rights and way of life.  People from all over the world came to the aid of Texas back then.  Imagine what would happen now, in the Age of Communications, if a few stalwart folks stood up to tyranny and said, "No more!"

Oops...don't have to imagine.  Just look at Egypt.  LOL!
Remember the Alamo!  Remember Goliad!

In other news:
DHS Launches New Alert System to Terrorize Public
Algore is on the BoD of the Least Green Company in America (LOL!!)

No comments:

Post a Comment

Feel free to leave your own view of The Far Side.