A Texan Prepares

I occasionally get comments of the sort that I'm full of excetum bovis and don't believe half the stuff I say, or in this case write about.  One of the things I am very serious about is being prepared, following the wisdom of Louis Pasteur, who famously said, "Fortune favors the prepared mind (La fortune favorise l'esprit préparé).".  

I grew up with hurricanes and tornadoes, and I now live in one of the most earthquake prone, volcanic regions on the planet.  Furthermore, we are all living through a period in which the Bumbledicks are driving humanity to the point where things have already started to burn.  Living the prepped life, as I always have, means being fully self-sufficient under as many different circumstances as I can imagine for as long as I possibly can - meaning the rest of my natural days.

One reason I do this is to provide the most comfortable lifestyle for my family under the worst possible circumstances.

Another reason is that I have no intention of being one of those hapless people sitting in a filthy refugee camp being screamed at by goons with pathological lack of empathy and bad breath.

When one begins the process of prepping, the first order of business is to assume the worst possible scenario one thinks is most likely.  For example, a major earthquake and tsunami wipe out any semblance of civilized living, and it is necessary to get far away from the filth, rot and despair left behind.  Or perhaps millions of people are driven to desperation and begin revolting, followed by a strict military clamp down and one needs to bug out fast.  Both scenarios have occurred within the past 50 years right here - the Banda Aceh quake and tsunami of 2004, and the military coup of 1964, or the sequel in 1998.  I have no reason to believe they couldn't happen again.

So, once one imagines the worst-case scenario, one begins to ponder what things would be most important and then figure out a way to address the issues in the smallest, lightest way available.  I also look for solutions that have multiple uses, so that each item you carry has a range of survival applications.

Finally, I highly recommend reading the Foxfire Series of books.  This is a collection of lessons learned for self-sufficient living taken from folks living in the Appalachian mountains of the US (a.k.a. hillbillies).  Tools are useless if you don't know how to use them.

Priority #1: Water

The average person will die in 3-5 days without water, and dehydration is not a pleasant way to go.  There's also the issue of parasites and bacteria, which need to be addressed to prevent illness.  My pack contains a Berkey Sport filter and storage for up to 10 liters for drinking and hygiene.  I also have the necessary skills to make a water filter out of sand and charcoal, as well as knowing how to find subsurface water. 

Note also the the mylar space blankets and climbing rope (mentioned below) can be rigged to catch dew and rain water for collection in the 10-liter water bladder.

Priority #2: Food

The average person will die in 20-30 days without food.  In the tropics, finding food in the wild is not particularly difficult, but there is the matter of getting to it.  My pack contains some beef jerky and 1kg of mixed nuts, which provide a surprising variety of vitamins, minerals, fats, and carbs in a compact and flavorful form.  Chewing nuts also activates the salivary glands to keep mouth, sinuses and esophogus moist.  I also have an assortment of seeds for vegetables if I manage to find a place where I don't have to move for a few months.  Additionally, the seeds themselves can be eaten and are full of energy.  Having skills for preserving and canning food are very handy, as well.

In addition to trail snacks, I have energy bars and soup packets, along with a German military style cook set, with two pots and a bowl in one neat package.

Priority #3: Shelter

Being able to get out of the elements is not only physically desirable, it has a significant psychological effect.  My pack contains a machete, a hatchet, several knives, a 30m climbing rope, and mylar space blankets that can all be used to create and secure a make-shift shelter and even a house with enough time and scavenged materials.  I also have a 4-person tent with enough room for 3 people and gear, which can shelter up to 6 people if half sleep at night while the other half keep watch, and vice versa.

There are tools, as well.  A Leatherman's 17-in-1, a portable tool kit with a hammer, crescent wrench and pliers, and a gross of nylon and velcro cable ties.

Included under shelter are clothes.  I carry 5 t-shirts, 3 pairs of shorts, 3 pairs of underwear, socks and a towel - always a towel.  If you've read Douglas Adams, then you know how useful and necessary a towel can be.

Priority #4: First Aid

This is one thing that you can never fully anticipate nor preapare for.  Fortunately, my wife and I don't require any regular medications, so a well-designed First Aid kit, some aspirin, and a variety of salves, cleansers and bandages is sufficient for most foreseeable issues.  A little training in basic first aid helps, as well.  Knowing how to set bones, close punctures and stanch bleeding is far more valuable than a weighty pack of stuff.  Don't forget that a sewing kit not only repairs fabric, but can close a wound in a pinch, as well.   Here, the most useful tools are a sharp pair of scissors and tweezers.

Priority #5: Communications & Luxuries

These are items that are extremely useful and can make life a lot more comfortable, but not critical to survival.

My pack contains a solar panel with two USB ports for phones, power banks and a 21-channel shortwave radio.  The flashlight is also solar charged and has a third USB port.  I have a trekking stick with built-in compass and flashlight that also serves to hook fruit a high as 4m off the ground (my height plus the stick).  There's an air mattress and sleeping bag to make like just a little bit more tolerable, a magnifying glass for starting fires with a lens cleaning cloth, and a supply of Zip-Lok bags to keep things dry.  I also carry a 2T solid-state disc with scans of all our documents, which I won't bother to list, but think of all the documents you might need in an emergency, along with a little cash and barter items.  On the way out the door, I can also grab my original identity docs.

Altogether, the pack weighs about 20kg, or 50 pounds.  It's a monster, but I agonized over the purchase and ended up with a Kelty Coyote 85-liter.  It is extremely comforable and buckles up nice and tight to prevent load shifting and keep the weight close to my body.  I am 189cm/6'-2" and the pack still has a little extra slack in all directions.

Life, as George Carlin obserived, is having a place for your stuff and an ever decreasing supply line of smaller versions of your stuff.  My pack is designed for maximum survivability and functionaality, without sacrificing some key comforts.  In a pinch, though, there are things that can be shed to lighten the load.  Some are handy, other just fun, and any of those items can be pitched to get more agile.  

So, there you are.  Money where my mouth is.  I am personally prepared for what I think may be the worst-case scenario in the near to mid future, and it is adapted to the environment where I live.  The only remaining skill is knowing how to pack for maximum efficiency and functionality.

A note about electronic devices and carrying a solar charger.  Plenty of people say why bother with this if it's TEOTWAWKI.  My phone has two 128Gb SD cards, one in the phone and one stored in a safe,dry spot.  Both are loaded with books, music, art, and even a couple of indispensable movies. My book collection contains about 4,000 titles ranging from how-to references to the most arcane philosophical treatises (think of all the reading time you'll have with no TeeVee).  I am essentially carrying Western civilization on 2 grams of silicon.  Though your phone may not reach out and touch anyone, it can be a life-saving reference library and educational tool.

None of this is wasteful or silly.  Every last bit of it can be used for recreational hiking and camping.  Considering the Frankenvaxxx has probably killed off most commercial pilots, I anticipate doing a lot of that for the foreseeable future, since we won't likely get off the island any time soon.

No worries, though.  Indonesia has 5,000 deserted islands just waiting for me to assault them.

Ladies And Gentlemen, The Presidents Of The United States

Special Note: Prior to my usual tirade, a note on blindness.  I've been telling folks for a couple of years now that I have begun 'seeing' sounds.  If you remember the movie "Daredevil" with Ben Affleck, then picture the effect they used when we would hit something with his stick and there'd be echoes off of objects.  It's a lot like that, only my resolution is not that good, but enough to see obstacles.  One problem.  it works best when things are dead quiet, and even better if dark too.  I'm lucky in that I still have about 20% of my original vision, but it seems that my brain is making adjustments for the lost capability.  I drive my wife crazy by practicing this new skill at night by clapping my hands sharply and looking at the light show, then opening my eyes and seeing how accurate the echoes were.  At 6' to 8', I'm off by about 6".

At any rate, seems there's a group of researchers who have confirmed this effect, and there's even a test to see if you have the ability.  Needless to say, I passed the test.  Look for the video link at the bottom of the article.  Since this effect does exist, it stands to reason that sighted people can develop it, as well, with a conscious effort.  It is trainable, as I can attest.  Could be a very handy skill for night navigation, and even in the day for 'seeing' things that are hidden or not obvious with the eyes.

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We're going to go way out on a limb and call the US election next week.  The winner will be...

Omittma Baromneyak

Now you may think we're being cute mixing the names of both major-party candidates, so that whoever wins, we're right.  Well, of course, that's part of it, but we have a deeper meaning.

We suspect that BOTH candidates WILL win.  In other words, a co-presidency...at least for a time.  We predict a series of 'natural' (nature provides the greatest plausible deniability) disasters will cause the elections to be postponed, and to quell the outcry, both men will be given equal status as 'leaders of the (ahem) free world' until such time as things can be re-arranged.  Say 2020 or so.

This would seem to be the ideal solution, since presumably the extreme views of both men would be cancelled out and the consensus view would hold sway.  It would allow the 'ring masters' to placate the greatest number of people with one fell swoop. The 100% of idiots who keep telling pollsters they want either of the two leading idiots would all be happy.  Those of us who are aware of what day it is, on the other hand, would know that the end has finally come and that nothing can stop the train at the other end of the tunnel now.

How would this work, you ask.  Well, it's quite simple actually.  Many corporations have a president and a CEO who are not the same people.  You could divide up the foreign and domestic duties between the two and they would have to concur on military matters, which does look like it would lead to a lot of soul searching in the White House in that respect.

One could take over the West Wing and the other takes the East.  The Oval Office would become the Parabolic Offices.  They could share the nice, new underground bunker underneath.  There might be some conflict over the dinner guests, with George Strait duking it out with Beyonce, but the Chief of Staffs could hash that little problem right out.

Heck, we could even start to refer to them as the Harlequin Twins and Paul McCartney and Stevie Wonder could go out on a Legends Tour (like the Rolling Bones) and promote racial harmony because of the amazing developments in DC.  Next thing you know, dogs and cats would be living together!

Could it happen?  Why not?  They (the pit bosses) tried the direct route in 2000, and that led to an open wound that some people still can't get over, including Sweet Al.  If both won and became co-presidents, it would make everyone happy, especially if 'yin' got the foreign stuff, and 'yang' got the domestic end.

Balance and harmony would break out everywhere!

It is an elegant solution in its simplicity, and one which we are certain the pit bosses have considered if not implemented.  Are there signs that they have implemented this 'final' solution?

Let's see...there's Hurricane Sandy.  Now mind you, this 'hurricane' has 75mph sustained winds.  For those of you who have never experienced a hurricane, winds like that are FUN!  I've sat out in 75mph winds and watched the rain fall sideways.  We're not talking end of the world-type stuff here.  If you blow on the palm of your hand as hard as you can, that's about 75mph wind.

Oh sure, there may be downed power lines and uprooted trees, but it sure doesn't justify evacuation notices stating 'if you do not survive' and estimates of $3 billion in damages with the East Coast becoming a vast swamp.  Sorry, doesn't work like that.  The storm is moving at 13mph, which means it will blow over in about 3 hours and the skies will clear and all will be as it was, minus a coupld of trees in Central Park.  Be sure and check out the eye.  It's really cool.

The amount of fear and hype being generated over the least little things these days is rather astounding.  During hurricanes, they always point to Katrita, but fail to mention that New Orleans is 9-feet lower than the sea, or that Houston never even got rainfall from the other storm.  But millions of people panicked and clogged hiways for hundreds of miles and emptied stores.

So maybe fear and panic are tools, since 'they' seem to have this pathological desire to keep people in a state of stampede for the stupidest things.  There can be no other explanation than the resulting chaos provides endless entertainment to 'them'.  We here on the Far Side refuse to entertain someone without being paid...well.

Could 'they' be creating a hurricane right now to initiate problem-reaction-solution (Hegelian Dialectic)?  Sure.  A hurricane is driven by heat.  Using microwaves to heat the ocean, one can stir up an otherwise minor storm.  Then, to steer it, you simply heat of corridor of the atmosphere with radio waves that would draw the hurricane in much like a magnet would draw iron fillings.  All of this can be done using advanced radar-generating spacecraft, or ground stations in combination with orbiting reflectors to focus and intensify the waves.

In fact, we suspect that we saw a test of the system earlier this year, in which a template - in this case the storm track of Katrina - was uploaded to the system and a new storm (Isaac) was made to follow the predetermined path.

Can it control earthquakes?  Well, doggone it if Fukushima didn't serve a lot of goals and policies of the Western empire and hit the exact weakest point to create the most amount of damage over the longest possible term.

We're just sayin'...

If we add up all the behaviors of the various governmental groups over the past 20 or 30 years, it would certainly appear that something BIG is about to happen that may or may not be out of the control of whatever group is responsible for all this.  You've got the Far Sight Institute and HalfPastHuman going off about rocks in space.  You've got the 2012ers jumping up and down about the Mayans and Egyptians.  You've got the Neo-Mammonic televangelists stirring up end-time fears.

And then you've got folks like us here at Life on the Far Side.  We get these weird 'spidey-sense' things, kind of like butterflies in your stomach, but based on anticipation rather than anxiety.  It's a lot like that feeling you had as a kid on Christmas Eve when you laid in bed waiting for the next morning.

So time for 20 Questions:
Is something BIG about to happen? Yes.
Is it man-made or natural? Probably both.
Will humanity survive? Of course
Will things be better after it? Let's hope so.
When will it happen? Soon.
Is all this storm/EQ stuff part of it? No, this is dress rehearsal.
What is the best/worst place to be when it happens? No place/any place.
What are my chances? About the same as doing 100mph on a city freeway, and just as preventable.
Will people panic?  Of course.

People always panic when things change.  As a race, we become accustomed to and crave routine.  We can't stand it when there's a major upheaval in our lives.  We'd even point out that most of the problems in a disaster is people panicking instead of rationally and coolly evaluating the situation and taking appropriate action.

Could all of this come to pass?  Why not?  The government media (ABC, CBS, NBC, Fix, PBS) have gone out of their way to cast this election as 'too close to call', making 2000 a dress-rehearsal.  Co-presidents would make the most number of people happy, at least in the short-term.  Hell, Romney is right handed and Obama left.  They could even hold hands while co-signing Emergency Executive Orders!  What a sight that would be!  Black/white, left/right ruling together.

So, anyway, might want to steel yourself for the fun that's coming soon to a planet near you.  We should see a big push in the near future to slice the world into three parts: North/South America and Greenland, Europ/Iceland/Africa, and China/Oceania/Australia.  This would allow the Secret World Government in Antarctica to rule the world with minimal effort, with all the dirty work taking place in the immediate aftermath of whatever is coming.

Should we panic?  Hell no.  You can rest assured, based on history, that 'they' are doing the exact wrong thing at the exact wrong time for the exact wrong reasons.  Since 'they' go through life with severely myopic vision, 'they' never see the train coming.  'They' always react to perception rather than reality.  Just keep your wits about you and take reasonable precautions, like all clear-thinking people do all the time.

It's not the fall that hurts, it's the sudden stop at the end.  Take all necessary action to control where you land, and like that crazy Austian guy (but we repeat ourselves), enjoy the fall.
TEOTWAWKI isn't always a bad thing.