Faery Tales For Conspiracy Theorists

Let's engage in a little wild-eyed speculation, shall we?

The following is a complete flight of fancy set out in a fictional narrative.  The names and places are completely made up and any resemblance to real persons, places or events is purely coincidental, just like all the relationships mentioned herein.

Two men named George Floyd and Derek Chauvin worked at the same club, El Nuevo Rodeo, for 17 years.  Chauvin was a police officer in the 3rd Precinct located a short distance away from the club.  Both men worked security a the club.

The former owner of the club, Maya Santamaria (an assumed name) has a Spanish name but a Jordanian passport.  She sold the club in 2019, just months before the catalytic incident.

Maya Santamaria was a socialite, with many photos of her with prominent members of society floating around the internet, and a Twitter account that was followed by a cast of local, state and national figures prominent in the Obama administration and/or the 2016 Clinton campaign.  Two of the names that have been mentioned are John Brennan and Tony Podesta.  There doesn't appear to be a compelling reason for such individuals to know of or follow a bar owner's account, unless the margaritas there were legendary.

Maya Santamaria also had the distributorship for Inca Kola, a popular product of Peru.  Peru is known by the US Secret Service for producing some of the best counterfeit dollar notes in the world.  George Floyd passed a counterfeit dollar note the day he died.

Both Jordan and Peru are also a major global hubs for human trafficking of women and children.

Inca Kola is delivered from the Port of New Orleans or Seattle to Minneapolis via Canadian National railway, which is owned by Bill Gates.

Derek Chauvin worked for the Minneapolis police for several years.  His record of questionable killings and rights violations is rather long, including an incident where he and other officers unloaded 47 shots in 15 seconds into a suspect's car.  Despite a number of cases being referred for prosecution, then-Hennepin County attorney Amy Klobuchar refused to press charges against him, almost as if he were being protected.

George Floyd, on the day of his death, went into a convenience store and made a purchase with a counterfeit $20 bill.  The store clerk called the police, not because of the funny money, but because Floyd returned to his car and sat there 'acting strangely'.  By pure coincidence, Floyd's co-worker at the El Nuevo Rodeo, one Derek Chauvin, arrived to answer the call.

Seeing that his co-worker was clearly not himself, Chauvin did not call EMT services, but rather dragged Floyed out of the car, cuffed him, then applied strong pressure to the back of Floyd's neck before someone called an ambulance.

When the ambulance arrived, video shows at least two of the men who got out appearing to be dressed in police uniforms.  There was no attempt to resuscitate Floyd at the scene.  Rather the ambulance occupants checked his pulse and immediately placed him on a gurney and drove him away.  Floyd was declared dead at the hospital.

In the riots that ensued after Floyd's death, two of the early targets of arson were the El Nuevo Rodeo club and the 3rd Precinct police station, where Chauvin was assigned.  Reports say the police abandoned the station with little resistance, and the evidence cage was ransacked before the fire.

Nearly all of the race riots in the US have occurred in cities and states dominated by members of the Democrat Party, including Minneapolis and Minnesota.  Strangely, many of those cities are served by the Canadian National railway.

It's a good thing all of this is a work of fiction, told by conspiracy theorists to their children at bedtime.  If a story like this were real, it would have profound implications for the death of George Floyd, the reason why Derek Chauvin was first on the scene and directly proximal to Floyd when he died.  It would also not look good for someone like Amy Klobuchar, a US Senator, a recent presidential candidate and currently on the short list as Joe Biden's running mate.

Furthermore, it would be very curious that so many political figures were connected to Maya Santamaria's social media and social club, and that Santamaria had connections to both Peru and Jordan, including a business relationship that involved shipping from Peru to Minneapolis via Bill Gates' railway.

It's also highly unlikely that two nations known as major hubs for human trafficking would have tangential connections to these events.

Certainly, none of this would ever happen in the real world.  That would be too strange.  It's even hard to swallow as a faery tale.

After all, crooked police never run protection rackets for crime rings, and crooked attorneys never cover for the crooked cops, and the chances that the two locations with potential evidence of crimes would never burn down in strange riots that seem to spring up out of nowhere during a global pandemic.

It all just stretches credulity to the breaking point.