Here Thar Be Monsters!

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Fool's Gold

Yes, folks, once again CERN's multi-billion dollar boondoggle #LargeHadronCollider has failed to find imaginary particles. But not to fear, if they can just have a few more billions of your hard-earned money, they are sure to find those little buggers!

The LHC has built to find the Higgs Boson, or so-called God Particle. It failed miserably, despite several false claims that were later disproved. In order to justify that vast expanse of having built the machine for nothing, they re-tasked it to find yet another imaginary particle called a Magnetic Monopole. Yes, that's a magnet with only a north or south pole, and not the opposite pole. Once again, it has failed miserably, but don't worry! They'll keep trying at your expense until they find those pesky ghosts.

This is NOT science. Science is disprovable. Science is observing an ACTUAL phenomenon, creating an hypothesis to explain it, then setting up experiments under controlled circumstances to try and replicate the phenomenon.

What CERN is doing is taking hypothetical mathematics that attempt to explain unobserved phenomena and then trying to prove the mental masturbation is correct. If it fails, that does not disprove the assertion, it only means that they will keep trying the same failure again and again until taxpayers turn off the money spigot.

Hey! It's steady work, right? And they get to play with some pretty cool toys that we paid for.

This is the very definition of "pseudoscience". It's a false premise. It can never be proven, because the phenomenon it is trying to find has never been observed. It's completely bass-ackwards of real science. It is deluding one's self into thinking something exists that does not, and then trying to make it exist.

Real science begins with real things and events.

One has to wonder if the taxpayer will ever wise up to this conscious and callous scam. A bunch of useless tinkerers have used a bunch of high-sounding gobble-dee-gook to hoodwink millions of people into giving lots of money to build impressive looking, but ultimately useless machines to find ghosts that don't exist.

Imagine what we could have achieved putting all that time, money and effort to use on real problems!

What would you rather pay for?

An EM-Drive that actually works despite all these bloated idiots saying that it can't possibly do so?

Or a search for imaginary particles with no practical use that exist only on some math grad student's thesis paper and have never, ever been seen in reality?

Well, at least we get some nifty artist's conception drawings for all those billions.


Richard Cassaro on Radio Far Side

Is there evidence for an ancient civilization that spanned the entire globe?  Why do specific symbols and iconography reappear in religions, art and architecture in all human civilizations?  Is there a hidden history and wisdom that can be discerned by studying humanity’s ancient monuments?  Stay tuned!
Richard Cassaro is an author and journalist who has studied the extensive and occult connections between religions, architecture, secret societies, and an hypothesized ancient advanced global civilization.  Richard writes for Rizzoli Publications and travels the world presenting his compelling research into the religious symbology that spans time and space across the planet.
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Trump And The Art Of War

"All warfare is based on deception. Hence, when able to attack, we must seem unable; when using our forces, we must seem inactive; when we are near, we must make the enemy believe we are far away; when far away, we must make him believe we are near. Hold out baits to entice the enemy. Feign disorder, and crush him. If he is secure at all points, be prepared for him. If he is in superior strength, evade him. If your opponent is of choleric temper, seek to irritate him. Pretend to be weak, that he may grow arrogant. If he is taking his ease, give him no rest. If his forces are united, separate them. Attack him where he is unprepared, appear where you are not expected. "

For those familiar with Sun Tzu"s "The Art of War," those words are very familiar. They comprise part of the "bible" of warfare that have withstood thousands of years as solid advice to leaders. The treatise is 13 chapters long and offers solid counsel to anyone involved in head-to-head combat, and that includes the negotiating table. I have personally applied these rules in negotiations with great success.

Keeping those words in mind, and remembering that they are just the opening of a much longer treatise, calmly and dispassionately examine the past year of Donald Trump's presidency. If you do not invest your emotions into this, you will see that he is clearly employing this strategy.

Being undeniably a successful businessman, it is a very safe bet that he has read and absorbed Sun Tzu, and most likely Machiavelli as well. A close examination of his methods and persona lead me to conclude that he is following at least these two playbooks to the letter.

Anyone who has studied martial arts, particularly those of Asia, know that Sun Tzu is required reading. The tenets of his book work on any scale, whether one-on-one, or nation-against-nation. A combatant who has the moral authority will feign weakness and draw his opponent out of their safe zone. At that point, it is a simple matter to cut them off from retreat and utterly defeat them.

If you have been studying Trump's techniques, he has done exactly this. In his ongoing battle with the media, he sets a hook, the media bite, and he reels them in. It's almost embarrassing how simple it is to defeat the media at every turn.

Trump makes what appears to be a gaff of some kind. For example, let's take the "shit hole" controversy. Trump knows, as I do, that they way those blow-dried puffballs talk off-camera is every bit as bad - if not worse - than what Trump is reported to have said. The media, in their rush to try to strike the fatal blow, have extended far past their safe zones, and if you are watching closely, the killing blow is already coming - but from Trump's side, not the media's. Keep in mind when you read the following link that it is coming from Russia, the supposed enemy of Trump [].

Trump's enemies are playing into a classic trap. Trump knows that victory in war comes through deception. He has not achieved the things he has across four decades without having a keen sense of warfare. He has survived bankruptcies and scandalous divorces, yet everything he touches turns to gold. He is obviously a master at turning lemons into lemonaide.

The Killdeer bird will flop around on the ground and pretend to have a broken wing to draw predators away from their nests. If this doesn't describe Trump to a "T" then nothing can. Trump uses his weaknesses as lures to distract the attention of his opponents in order to slam the trap shut on them as soon as they venture out of their holes. When one looks at Trump's candidacy and presidency dispassionately, one perceives a long list of victories that used his weaknesses (shooting off his mouth for one) as lures to distract from his real intentions.

One doesn't have to like Trump to respect his masterful skill and technique in - pardon the pun - trumping his enemies. Tom Cruise is a complete jerk, but that doesn't stop us from being entertained by his films. One does, however, have to respect the fact that Trump is a formidable opponent. One places one's self in mortal jeopardy by underestimating Trump's abilities.

Trump studied the political environment in the United States. As a television star, he learned the inner workings of the mass media. As a real estate magnate, he mastered the art of negotiation. As a marketeer, he understood the art of turning weaknesses into benefits. He is no fool. More to the point, all the talk of "fire and fury" and "mental incompetence" only plays into his strategy. He wants his opponents to think he is feeble and weak, so when the trap slams shut, they will be a stunned as they are defeated.

The Left in the US have invested everything in emotional appeal, and that is the easiest thing to exploit. Howling at the sky and mindless chanting reveals just how devoid that movement is of mental acuity and reason. It makes them incredibly easy to defeat, and Trump is utilizing this to his continued benefit.

If you hate Trump, then the only way to fight is to study his tactics and fight accordingly. If you love Trump, then you must study and adopt the same strategies. Either way, mindless fighting or following only plays into his hands. He is a cold, calculating strategist, and a brilliant one at that.

Study Sun Tzu and you will find the key to opposing or supporting him. Putin has done this, and that makes him a viable opponent or supporter of Trump. I suspect that Putin has studied Trump's strategies and is playing into them, whether by collusion or not. Xi has done the same thing, which makes sense since Xi has undoubtedly studied Sun Tzu.

There is a grand game of deception afoot in the international arena, and I suspect that Trump is sending signals without actually communicating verbally, since surveillance is a very real and dangerous threat. Trump is behaving in certain ways that tell Putin and Xi that he understands the game and knows how to play it at master's level. Whether Putin and Xi are acting in concert or opposition is a matter of interpretation, but to my mind, they know what is going on and can read the tea leaves, as it were.

The thinking man or woman will immediately flip over and refresh themselves on Sun Tzu and Machiavelli. Love or hate Trump, or any other political figure, it is wise to analyze their strategies and techniques. You cannot oppose or support someone without being completely in synch with their movements. Even if you are complete agnostic on these matters, understanding how the game is being played makes it much more entertaining.

One key assumption is missing in much of the US Left thinking - if one can call it that. They assume, or at least have convinced themselves, that Trump is an idiot. NEVER underestimate your opponent. If you assume he is stronger than you and you are wrong, you win. If you assume he is weaker than you, you lose. Simple fact that has withstood the test of time.


Rules For SJWs

Since we love a good cause, and violent protests against the evil overlords, we figured it was time to update Saul Alinsky's Rules for Radicals.  After all, that book was written by a white man back in the Dark Ages of the 1970s, when men and women could actually be in the same room together without written consent forms and feminism was about equal pay for equal work (assuming equal educational backgrounds, experience and on-the-job results).

Yes, being a Social Justice Warrior is not easy.  It's a socio-political mine field out there and you have to be careful where you step.  Most of all, it's about being consistent with your message and having integrity in your actions.

What follows is an essential playbook for the modern SJW.  By following these guidelines, you will always have a clear message using the most widely disseminated channels of communication and behave in a way that shows the world you have thoroughly thought out your message and live by it in both letter and spirit.

On with the training!

1. Get a good education - the modern educational system of liberal arts is based on the Greek model, which was, of course, created by white males hundreds of years before Christ.  The Trivium and Quadrivium were considered the most vital skills and knowledge base for a freeman, so that he could rise above any circumstance of birth and take his rightful place among civil society.  This system was further developed by white males during the Roman era into the modern university, which you will want to destroy with pointless and senseless classes like Sexism, Racism and (gag) Education.  With any luck, you will be able to pay for that education with loans through a banking system created by white men in Italy and the Netherlands.

2. Read Karl Marx - One of the most important tasks ahead of you is to read and thoroughly understand the Marxist/Socialist concepts, as laid out in his books Das Kapital and The Communist Manifesto.  After all, the best way to fight the white male patriarchal society is to use the political and financial theories of a white male.  Think of it as having insider information.

3. Create pamphlets and posters extolling Marxist/Socialist utopia - Now you are ready to promote your utopian message.  Don't forget that the word utopia (meaning nowhere) was invented by white man Sir Thomas More, for his book based on white man Plato's ideas in his book Republic (in which you live).  You will need cash (thankfully invented by the Chinese) to pay for the printing, which was invented by white man Johannes Gutenberg.  If you got a decent education, then you know how to use Adobe Creative Suite, founded by two white men John Warnoc and Charles Geschke, to do the layout for the digital presses, which were in turn created by white guys at Iris Graphics, and now owned by Eastman Kodak, which was started by a white man.  If your work is good enough, then you might be able to make a buck or two in the free capitalist market, which was developed by a bunch of white guys.

4. Charge mobile devices - Before heading out of the house, you will want to charge your smartphone and other communications devices.  Remember that alternating current was developed by Nikola Tesla, a white man, and that the cell phone was invented by Martin Cooper, a white man, and that the telephone itself was invented by white man Alexander Graham Bell.  Furthermore, you can thank white man John Bannister Goodenough for that fast-charging, long-lasting lithium ion battery in all your devices.  Of course, the smartphone was developed by IBM, a company founded by white men, in 1992.  You'll need your devices to take photos (invented by French white guy Nicéphore Niépce) and/or video (created by Willard Boyle and George Smith, a couple of white men).

5. Practice Public Speaking - Oratory and rhetoric are fine skills, developed to an art form by a bunch of ancient Greek white guys, as you could probably tell by the etymology of those two words, based on your quality education.  Enunciation and diction (both concepts developed by Roman white guys) are key to effective public speaking.  If you achieve a high level of skill in this area, you will be able to motivate and educate your gender non-conformist, racially ambiguous fans to cast off the evil white patriarchy that has done nothing for your or them, except keep you oppressed.  As you speak clearly and concisely to your audience, don't forget that the rights to assemble and protest were formulated by a bunch of oppressive French and British white guys during that despicable period in patriarchal history called the Enlightenment.  Also keep in mind that your activities here are part of a long, arduous process begun by a bunch of privileged white British males who conceived of the Magna Carta, which started the centuries-long process of ending the feudal slavery system under privileged white royalty.  Since English is the de facto international language, you will want to use this creation of white folks called Angles, who were an off-shoot of the white folks called Teutans, and which has been added to and modified by Latin, Greek and French, all languages created by other brands of white folks.

6. Social Media - One of the cheapest and most effective means to get your Marxist/Socialist message out to a waiting world is to use Social Media.  Facebook (created by white guy Mark Zuckerberg), Google (created by white guys Larry Page and Sergey Brin) and Twitter (created by white guy Jack Dorsey) are ubiquitous and allow Marxist/Socialist SJWs instant access to white-male hating audiences around the world for free.  Social media uses the internet, developed by a bunch of white men at DARPA, and functioning on the TCP/IP system invented by Vint Cerf and Robert Kahn - two very white men - and on HTML language created by another white guy named Tim Berners-Lee.  As you tweet your Marxist/Socialist SJW message, it is likely to use at least one geo-synchronous satellite in the process, devices first conceived of by despised white male author Arthur C. Clark.

7. Broadcast Your Message - In your quest to teach the world of the evils of the evil white patriarchy, you will want to focus on broadcast.  Though other white males are trying hard to make this form of communications technology obsolete with digital streaming, it is nonetheless effective, offering access to diverse, gender-neutral audiences.  Radio is cheap and plentiful and was invented by the slimy white male named Nikola Tesla (again).  Television offers a much broader and hypnotized audience, but due to free-market forces it is much more expensive.  The major news networks that are sympathetic to your cause are, of course, founded, owned and operated by white males, making it the ideal outlet for your anti-white male screeds.  Naturally, television technology was invented by a white guy named Philo T. Farnsworth

8. Travel to protests - As part of your vital SJW activities, you will want to travel to protests around the country, and if possible, around the world.  This is an excellent way to share strategies, trade information and network with like-minded gender-neutral, racially undefined folks just like yourself.  The most common modes of transportation include the bicycle (German white guy Karl von Drais), the automobile (more German white guys named Gottlieb Daimler, Karl Benz and Nicolaus Otto), and the airplane (white brothers Orville and Wilbur Wright).  We can't forget the jet engine, that makes it so much faster and easier to get to those SJW anti-white male rallies (invented by Dr. Hans von Ohain and Sir Frank Whittle).  Lest we forget, there is also the lowly train, invented by notorious white patriarch George Stephenson.

9 Blame white men for everything - This is the trickiest part of your SJW training.  You will be required to lambaste, harangue, chide, censure, chastise, rebuke, objurgate, and criticize the White Patriarchy for all the evils in the world, while still enjoying all the fruits of their labors.  Fortunately, the thousands of SJWs who have gone before you have laid down the groundwork, allowing you to make outrageous claims of abuse, without suffering from an obvious lack of integrity.  You will be greatly helped by the white-owned mass media, as you serve their purposes...for now.  Take full advantage of it while you can.

If you are one of those strange people that prefers to live what you preach, and remain faithful to the message you deliver to the world, then you will have to make do with sitting in a dark cave eating whatever you can catch with your bare hands, and never travelling further than your own two feet can carry you, while remaining completely silent until you have mastered a non-white language that a vast majority of the world will understand - like English, but darker.

Good luck gender non-conforming, racially ambiguous, fully diverse folks!  It's your time, strike while the iron's hot.  And don't forget that the Chinese invented gunpowder, so it's OK to blow stuff up and shoot people.


2018 Predilection Issue

Yes folks, it’s time once again for the most anticipated, oft quoted and occasionally reviled Annual Predilection Issue, where we don’t predict the future, but just follow the trends to their logical conclusions.

Last year’s report had a stunning 98.0819% accuracy rate.  We correctly predilected Donald Trump’s firy infatuation with North Korea’s Kim Jong-un and his jealous rages when he caught Unny playing Rubber Sheets and Petroleum Oil with Vlad the Impaler and Jinping the Kingpin.

We correctly predilected Florida’s new Disney Ski Resort opening amidst protestations that polar heating was causing frigid cold to reach the 28th parallel, and NASA taking credit for cooling the planet with all its hot air.

We also correctly predilected that Harvey Wine-mug would lead a mass Hollywood conversion to Quakerism, with public confessions becoming all the rage.  The trend became so popular that it has even reached the halls of CONgress, where the airing of dirty laundry has become practically rampant.

So, without futher self-congratulations, we present the One, and thankfully the ONLY Far Side 2018 Predilection Issue!

10. The UK Royal Breeding Program to Save Endangered Privileged White Folks will announce its first Mulatto member, as second-string stud Prince Andy marries Marla Maples in the world’s most expensive virtual signal ever conceived.  The event will be heralded as the Most Amazing Act of Auto-Racism ever performed in public.

9. The Marxist/Progressivist feeding frenzy will continue apace adherents try to out-signal each other, causing mass riots as they suddenly realize that every medium they rely on to get their message out was invented by a white male, including the alternating current that powers their smartphones.  They are finally silenced when they realize en masse that the English language was invented by white males, too.

8. Ski resort owners will have their greatest year ever across the Northern Hemisphere as the season extends into late August.  They will shut down for two weeks out of sheer exhaustion, only to re-open in early September amidst record snowfall in Southern California.  Al Gore will be kidnapped and vanish for four months, only to be discovered frozen solid inside a snowman in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico.

7. A group of adventurous French teenagers will come upon Emmanuel Macron and Angela Merkel in the Paris catacombs playing a bizarre sex game in which they take turns spanking each other and yelling the names “Hitler” and “de Gaulle”.  The teens will upload a video to D-Tube which will instantly garner over one billion hits and earn the teens over $20 million STEEM DOLLARS.  Country singer Bertie Higgins will rocket back to fame with a re-release of his hit “Bogey and Bacall,” changing the names to “Hitler and deGaulle”.

6. Italian-Americans will cry out with one voice as new revelations will expand the PizzaGate scandal and successive scandals will be called SpaghettiGate, MacaroniGate and EnsalattaRusticaGate.  Olive Garden restaurants will quietly shift its menu to Greek food.  There will be talk of re-opening the Colosseum in Rome and feeding child sex traffickers to the lions for public entertainment.

5. The world will breathe a sigh of relief when Iran finally throws off the shackles of Islamic theocracy and returns to its heyday under the Shah, since the US and Israel will no longer have a good excuse to invade the country.  Elation will turn to horror, though, when the world realizes just how smart and industrious the Persian people really are, as most of the major advances in science, art and literature will come out of the newly renamed Persia.  Washington will add Persia back on the Axis of Evil list when the country becomes only the fourth nation to land a rover on the Moon and proceed to prove the Moon landings never took place.

4. Bitcoin will hit $100,000 by mid-year as nearly the entire world adopts cryptocurrencies for all transactions, suddenly crashing every national currency on the planet in a single week.  By the end of the year, nearly every human being will join a local autonomous collective, stop voting in national elections and simply ignore all existing governments.  There will be an explosion of art and technology as crowd funding turns to supporting radical inventions and real artists.  A new form of entertainment will arise as bands of homeless lawyers, politicians and bureaucrats roam from place to place trying to pass laws and levy taxes.

3.  Related to Predilection #4, the #GeezerMedia will finally die.  People will simply stop going to Hollywood movies, pro sports games and tuning in to 24-hour news channels.  Google, Amazon and Farcebook will vanish practically overnight as folks lose interest in having mega-corporations mine their personal data for profit and not sharing with the rightful owners.  The masses will not only find themselves much happier, but with a lot of extra time on their hands for creating stuff of real value to society.

2. SpaceX will announce that the two billionaires who have paid for a trip around the Moon are, in fact, Jeff Bezos and Mark Zukerberg.  The world will watch in amazement as the two meddlesome tech giants are roasted alive in the Van Allen Belts.  Soon after, people around the world will be sending in suggestions for other pairs to be sent on a one-way trip to the Moon.  One of the most popular pairings will be George Soros and Pope Francis I, with over one billion votes.

1. Hillary Clinton will be selected as the December cover girl for Better Cells and Wardens magazine.  Later the same month, she will be caught trying to tunnel out of Levenworth using a life-size poster of Saul Alinsky to cover the hole in her wall.  An inspection will reveal her digging tools inside a copy of Rules for Radicals, which she refers to as her Bible.  After being discovered, Hillary will retreat into her mental “safe space,” sitting in a corner petting a stuffed white Persian cat, wearing gold-colored contacts and muttering the word “spectre” for the rest of her natural born days.

That's it for this coming year.  Be sure to check back next year when we review our score card.  And don't forget to check in regularly as we trash the pretentious pop culture and bring a little reason to bear on society.