Here Thar Be Monsters!

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Circus Maximus

I am proud to say I haven't seen a single second of the GOP convention, and the same will likely go for the DNC, as well.  Judging from the headlines, I haven't missed anything, either.

For all the huffing and puffing leading up to the event, the biggest story to come out of it was Melania Trump stealing a couple of lines from Michelle Obama.  You'll forgive me if I don't get all lathered up over this non-issue.  After all, if you took away plagiarism, political folks would not have much to say.  Politicians absolutely depend on their ability to steal other people's stuff, though normally we call it "taxes."

All the Stop Trump furor and threats of radical protests pretty much fizzled.  There was a brief hurrah on the first day that got squished right out of the box.  One bit of fun was a handful of people getting arrested when someone set himself on fire while trying to burn a flag.  First rule of protesting, don't shoot yourself in the foot.

My favorite highlight so far was the stand-off between Breitbart and the Daily Show.  If you haven't seen the video yet, it is well worth a minute for the laughs - not from the show, but at the show.  Watching a liberal 'comedy' production trying to disabuse a conservative news outlet of free speech outside a party for gay conservatives hosted by Breitbart is just priceless.  Funnier than anything the lousy 'comedy' show could ever come up with on its own.

Ted Cruz, the - I'm ashamed to say - Senator from Texas (though not Texan) managed to turn a standing ovation into a hearty round of booing.  Apparently, this bozo hasn't learned the First Rule of Sore Loosing: don't try to take your opponent on his own turf.  Like the obnoxious drunk at a garden party, Cruz pissed in the flower boxes and then got belligerent about it.  So much for his career in politics.

It seems that the biggest news from the RNC didn't even take place anywhere near the event.  The Big Story was the media itself, as Roger Ailes quit FoxEwes and left Rupert Murdoch fighting to keep his stable of loudmouths intact.  Apparently, Ailes has been dodging accusations of being a male of the species, with such luminous personalities as Megyn Kelly, who accused Ailes of an enthusiastic hug TEN FREAKIN' YEARS AGO!  Reports said she had blood coming from her 'whatever' over the whole matter.

A shark feeding frenzy comes to mind.

One is left with the impression, as this quadrennial political orgy comes to a close, that all the huff and puff has been nothing more than the media trying their damnedest to stir up some ad revenues.  Betting on Trump doing something - anything - to cause controversy, the nets have gone out of their way to speculate on eyeballs tuning in for the fun.

The whole thing reminds me of a walk down Bourbon Street in New Orleans (pre-Katrina), with barkers warning the crowd that the female mud wrestlers have taped their nipples in case their clothes are ripped from their bodies.

In other words, all the hype has been nothing more than a bunch of carnival midway promises of fun and adventure that always seem to be just less than imagination.

The lesson that everyone should be taking away from all this hubbub is that if elected, Trump will be like every other president in US history.  He might be charismatic and say lots of funny things, but in the end, his administration will be just as effective - or ineffective - as all those before him.

Campaign promises come and go.  Obama promised "hope" and "change."  What the country got was "same ole shit."  Trump won't be any different.  He may improve some things, and make others worse, just like anyone else sitting in the White House.

I maintain that the greatest American president ever was Chester A. Arthur.

"Who?" you say.

"Exactly," I reply.

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